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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27202658">Void</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/epiclucy/pseuds/epiclucy'>epiclucy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Original Female Character, Protective Lily Evans Potter, Young Sirius Black, dont fuck with her, fifth years are 17/18, oblivious OC, ofc knows how to defend herself</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:16:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>19,248</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27202658</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/epiclucy/pseuds/epiclucy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone in Hogwarts knew of Gwendolyn Crouch, whether it was due to her influential parents or rumoured Death Eater brother. </p><p>Quiet, quick-tempered and pure-blood, she's everything that Sirius Black hates. </p><p>Until she isn't.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>71</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>1974</b>
</p><p>The Crouch family dining room descended in a shallow silence. The girl was glaring hard at the table as she visibly shook while the boy stared death in the face.</p><p>"Bartemius, he didn't mean anything by it-" Mother tried.</p><p>"Yes, I did," the boy snarled.</p><p>"Father, don't-" a girl said.</p><p>"Do you wish to be with your brother too, girl?" Father asked venomously.</p><p>"Yes," she snapped. "If it means we can get away from you, then yes!"</p><p>There was a startled pause. Mother's eyes were shining and wide, a hand clasped over her mouth while the other clutched Father's arm. A silent plea.</p><p>"Go to your room," he ordered, jaw ticking.</p><p>The girls' fingers curled around the edges of the table. "Not without-"</p><p>Her breath hitched as a hand snapped over the table and roughly grabbed her face, blunt fingers digging into her jaw. "I did not ask you, girl! Now go to your room before you make it worse for yourself."</p><p>"You're a vile creature," she spat, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. Her heart was thudding against her ribcage but she still found the courage to stare back.</p><p>"Gwen," her brother spoke softly. "Just go. I will see you tonight."</p><p>As soon as Father ceased his hold on her, Gwendolyn did. And it might have been the biggest regret of her life.</p><hr/><p>
  <b>1976</b>
</p><p>Gwen was not ecstatic to return to Hogwarts, not by a mile, but it was a stretch to the feeling she got when she was at home. At home she had Mother, possibly the only person she could say she truly loved anymore since her brother left. She made it easier to be around Father. He was softer - still a harsh and demanding man, but feeling her Mother's presence nearby made it easier to bear.</p><p>She had her luggage hauled over her shoulder as she said her goodbyes to her parents.</p><p>"Goodbye, my love." Mother was tearful as she held her daughter's shoulders and looked up at her. She was a short frail woman, her long hair always pinned in a neat bun. "I'll see you for Christmas break."</p><p>"I'll write to you as often as I can," Gwen said with a genuine smile.</p><p>She pulled away to meet the stern face of Bartemius Crouch. "I expect great things from you, Gwendolyn," he said, hands clasped stiffly behind his back. "I do not wish to receive more letters from Dumbledore informing me of your transgressions, nor do I want you failing your classes like last year."</p><p>"Yes, Father."</p><p>"It's a new year, my girl." His lip twitched. Into a smile or a grimace, she couldn't tell. "Fifth-year is the time you will decide what you want to do."</p><p>Mother gently nudged Father's shoulder. "Come on, darling," she said. "Let her catch a seat on the train."</p><p>The man cleared his throat. "Right. Of course." He tried for an actual smile this time. Mother was the only person he listened to besides his superiors at the Ministry. Despite her general quietness, she always spoke up if Father was being too harsh with Gwen. "I'll see you in a couple of months, my girl."</p><p>Gwen nodded and hugged her Mother one last time before turning to board her train.</p><p>Father was right, though she hated to admit it. This was the year she needed to choose what she wanted to do for the rest of her life. Father always insisted she join the Ministry and follow in his footsteps despite her clear hatred for it, but he softened his dedication for her future at the end of fourth-year. She suspected Mother had a word with him about pressuring her since Gwen could never live up to her brother no matter how hard she tried.</p><p>Since Barty's departure, the expectation of continuing the family legacy fell to Gwen. She knew through late-night conversations that her brother never wanted to work in the Ministry, nor did he really know what he wanted to do until the moment he left.</p><p>Until he realised he wanted to work for Voldemort.</p><p>Gwen despised him for it. At the end of her third-year and his seventh, he told his family over dinner that he wanted to leave and work for him. Over dinner, with no warning to Gwen. She barely even got a goodbye.</p><p>
  <em> 'I'm doing the right thing, Gwen. You'll see. It might take you a while but you'll see.' </em>
</p><p>She hadn't seen him since that night over a year ago.</p><p>Gwen was early as she always was due to her Father's particular routine, and there were few people aboard the train. Most students, first-years especially, were still with their families doing last-minute shopping before they would leave for Hogwarts.</p><p>She was walking through the narrow passage of the train when she bumped into a group of Slytherins.</p><p>Malfoy and his group of twats. Of course.</p><p>Not wanting to be bothered on her first day, she considered spinning on her heel and sharing a carriage with the second-year Hufflepuffs. She nearly did, <em> nearly </em>, but then the blonde opened his mouth.</p><p>"Well if it isn't the blood-traitor." He chuckled. She rolled her eyes and attempted to move past him but he was quick to block the way. "My parents met your dear brother during the holidays." Gwen's eyes hardened, which only widened the blonde's smirk. "Unfortunately, I wasn't able to see him but I have heard some interesting things." Lucius leaned in as though he was sharing a secret. "I hear he's a <em> Death Eater </em> now."</p><p>Gwen's gaze snapped to his and she could feel blood rush to her face, an angry redness creeping onto her cheeks. "Get out of my way, Malfoy," she bit out.</p><p>He only grinned. "Or what, Crouch? I'm sure you don't want to be written up on your first day," he said.</p><p>"You think I care if I get written up? Seeing your pretty hair covered in blood would be worth it." She scoffed, feeling her hands shaking. "Just let me through and you can bother me during class. Think up some insults on the way."</p><p>Gwen tried barging past him but he grabbed her arm before she could dash to the next carriage.</p><p>"You dare speak to me like this? Threaten <em> me? </em>"</p><p>"Let go," Gwen warned. His fingers were a vice, pinching her skin. "Assaulting a student can get you written up."</p><p>"You would know all about that, wouldn't you?"</p><p>"Would you like to find out?" she sneered.</p><p>His icy eyes narrowed. "You-"</p><p>"Oi, Malfoy," a new voice spoke up from behind Gwen. "Don't you have kittens to torture? Let the bloody girl pass."</p><p>Lucius closed his eyes momentarily in irritation, before opening them to coldly greet their new guests. "Potter," he gritted through his teeth. His fingers flexed around her arm and she winced. "Lupin. This does not concern you."</p><p>"It bloody well does if you're in our way," Potter said. "For piss sake, have a day off! You're holding up other students."</p><p>Lucius grumbled something and it seemed like he wasn't going to heed his advice, until he looked behind the two boys to see that there were in fact a couple of students waiting to pass.</p><p>He snarled and roughly pushed her away. She grunted when her back hit the wall.</p><p>The malicious glint was directed at Gwen a moment later, with a smirk curling his lip. "We'll continue this conversation later, Crouch."</p><p>Gwen felt like she couldn't breathe, even when he returned to his compartment out of sight. She hadn't realised her hand was clasped around her wand and was quick to let it go.</p><p>
  <em> Don't get written up, Gwen. Don't get written up on your first day. </em>
</p><p>It wasn't until warm brown eyes filled her vision that she blinked back tears. "Are you okay?" Remus asked. He looked genuinely concerned. "Here, why don't you come with us and sit down for a minute?"</p><p>Gwen shook her head. "No." Her voice cracked on the syllable. She opened her mouth to say something else, she didn't know what, but no words came out.</p><p>She pushed through the gathering mass of students and entered the compartment of second-year Hufflepuffs instead. They went quiet when she slammed the door shut behind her, staring with wide-eyes. Still, one of them was nice enough to move her bag so she could sit in the corner.</p><p>She pulled her hood over her head and watched the students mill around as Lucius' words swam around her head.</p><p>
  <em> Death Eater. </em>
</p><hr/><p>Remus was tackled in a hug by Sirius and Peter as soon as he entered their compartment, despite seeing the two only a couple of weeks ago. James' parents were always accommodating to them, especially after finding out Sirius had to stay with his vile family during the holidays. They spent a week together at the Potter household and it was probably the most fun Remus had in the whole year.</p><p>They settled and chatted idly for a bit, catching up on their tail-end of the holidays when James brought up Malfoy.</p><p>"Saw him tormenting the Crouch girl in the middle of the bloody passage!" he complained.</p><p>"Crouch girl?" Sirius echoed with raised eyebrows. "<em> Gwendolyn Crouch? </em> And she didn't castrate the twat?"</p><p>Remus couldn't help but snort.</p><p>Gwendolyn wasn't necessarily a troublemaker, but to call her a good student would be a stretch. If she didn't turn up to classes late then she simply wouldn't attend at all. She still got the work and studied - Remus had seen her numerous times after class getting work from Professors and sitting in the library with her textbook open. He was unsure if she actually studied or pretended to, though judging by her grades she wasn't very good at it if she did.</p><p>Remus heard rumours that she had a free pass of some kind from Dumbledore himself, essentially letting her skive off whenever she wanted to. He also heard that she always got off the hook because of her Father being the Minister for Magic, and that Dumbledore was intimidated by him.</p><p>He also heard that she was Dumbledore’s and McGonagall's secret lovechild, and Bartemius Crouch Sr. gave his word he would look after her like she was his own, so Remus often ignored word of mouth.</p><p>"I think he said something weird to her. She was real quiet," James said. "Looked like she was gonna bloody cry when Moony asked if she was okay."</p><p>Remus raised an eyebrow at the look Sirius gave him. "Just because her brother works with <em> you-know-who </em> doesn't mean she does, too."</p><p>Sirius shook his head. "You give people the benefit of the doubt way too often," he muttered.</p><p>Peter spoke up. "She's the one you dared me to ask out to the Yule Ball, isn't she?" he asked.</p><p>Ah yes, the night their best friend was threatened by Gwendolyn before she stole half of his winnings with the promise she'd go with him, only to ditch him on the night anyway. While it was embarrassing for Peter at the time, they quickly found amusement from the whole ordeal. </p><p>"At least you got some Galleons out of it," Sirius pointed out. "Well, you got half. It was a win-win, really. You got money and didn't have to take her to the Ball."</p><p>"Sirius," Remus said.</p><p>"What? You see her cry once and suddenly you're defending her?" his friend objected. "Her brother and dad sympathise with my parents, Remus. My <em> family </em>. You know, the people who want all Muggles dead?"</p><p>"Come on, guys," James interjected. "We're not even an hour in and we're already arguing? Let's not let Crouch ruin our first day, eh?"</p><p>They agreed, though Remus was sure they'd continue their discussion tonight.</p><p>But still, as Remus talked and laughed with his friends, the girl lingered in the back of his mind and his smile was quick to fade.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gwen entered her new dorm to see that her new roommates were already there. Lily Evans, Alice Price and Marlene McKinnon, all huddled on the corner bed laughing.</p><p>The laughter was quick to cease when the girl walked in, however.</p><p>"Good morning, Gwen," Lily greeted politely while her friends averted their eyes. Gwen nodded, tilting her lip in what she hoped was a smile before darting her eyes away.</p><p>Lily was one of the few students who didn't actively ignore Gwen. In fact, she was always kind to her. The year before last, they sat together in Potions due to Lily's friends having different periods, and if she saw Gwen was struggling with work, which was often, she always tried to help her. Although it made Gwen uncomfortable at first, she soon grew used to it.</p><p>Whenever Gwen missed a class, she was always greeted with the same quiet <em>'are you okay?'</em> before Lily went off on a tangent on what she needed to know. Gwen couldn't tell if Lily thought she actually cared about schoolwork or wanted someone to talk to in Potions, but either way it was nice having someone to listen to. Even if she hardly participated in conversation.</p><p>And then her brother went to work for Voldemort and the Muggle-born girl avoided her like the plague. Not that Gwen could blame her, she encouraged it even, but the avoidance only lasted a couple of weeks. Lily must have come to her own conclusion on where Gwen stood when she switched seats with a Hufflepuff in Charms to talk to her. She even apologised for avoiding her as though they were actually friends. Gwen tried not to read too far into it as the girl was friends with practically everybody, but she still found it odd.</p><p>Gwen unpacked her luggage with a variety of spells; watching as her clothes folded neatly into drawers and her stationary set itself on her work desk. The chatter of the other girls started up again, quieter this time, and Gwen could only assume they were talking about her.</p><hr/><p>The Great Hall was bustling by the time she arrived. Students and teachers were milling around and chatting, leaving the Hall in a cacophony of noise that rang through Gwen's ears. She found an empty portion of the Gryffindor bench and sat down, taking a cup of water from the table's centre. Food wouldn't be brought out until first-years were assigned a house but Gwen wasn't feeling too hungry anyway.</p><p>She was absentmindedly swirling her straw through the water, watching the liquid ripple with the motion when she heard a group of distinct voices.</p><p>"I don't think this is a good idea-"</p><p>"Then sit somewhere else, James."</p><p>"Moony, why the hell would you want to-?"</p><p>"She was upset!"</p><p>"This really isn't-"</p><p>"Hey, Gwendolyn, right?" A presence made itself known on her left and the girl ceased her stirring. "Sorry if I keep bothering you. I... I just wanted to make sure you were alright after this morning." She inclined her head and saw the same brown eyes from the train. Remus' voice was quieter, more hesitant when he repeated, "Gwendolyn?"</p><p>Gwen turned her head away. Someone sat on her right - Peter, she recognised the stout boy from last year - while another two figures sat opposite her. "Gwen," she muttered, swallowing thickly.</p><p>"Gwen, you-? Oh! Yes, Gwen," Remus stammered, seeming lighter. "So... are you okay?"</p><p>The girl was close to rolling her eyes. "Yeah," she answered.</p><p>There was a beat of silence.</p><p>"You really choose the conversationalists, huh, Moony?" Sirius Black spoke up.</p><p>Gwen dropped her straw and glared at him. "I didn't bloody ask you to sit here, did I?"</p><p>"So she speaks more than one word!" The dark-haired boy looked half-amused and half-irritated.</p><p>Gwen hadn't had many interactions with Black, only occasionally passing each other in the hallway or sharing a few curt words when necessary. She knew about his brother, about his family and their ties with Voldemort. They likely worked close with her own brother. Her Father liked the Black family regardless of their ideals being on opposite ends of the spectrum. '<em>They're nice people underneath all of their prejudice</em>', he told her when questioned. The hypocrite.</p><p>"C’mon, Padfoot." James nudged his friend in an attempt to ease the tension. He glanced at Gwen's glower and sent a <em>why-did-you-do-this</em> look to Remus. "Dumbledore's about to start his speech."</p><p>"Lucky me," Gwen mumbled, lowering her glare to her water.</p><p>As Dumbledore began his grand speech and introduced a new Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor, Gwen wondered why in Merlin's name Remus decided to sit next to her. He was nice like Lily, definitely the nicest in his quadrant of friends, but he'd never been... well, like <em>this</em>. Malfoy and his cronies being twats to Gwen wasn't new and she was sure everybody at Hogwarts had witnessed their interactions, Professors included, so why did he suddenly seem so concerned?</p><p>Enemy of my enemy is my friend, maybe. The throbbing of her arm where Malfoy grabbed was a stark reminder how much she hated him.</p><p>Still, she just wanted the group to sit anywhere else. Gwen didn't want to spend her morning listening to them, especially with Black's obvious distaste for her.</p><p>The sorting ceremony finished with Dumbledore boasting a dramatic, "Now, let us feast!"</p><p>The students were quick to heed his command, all but Gwen who continued stirring her water with a hand resting under her chin, tuning out the conversations around her. It felt as though the heat of Sirius' stare was burning through her skull. Even when she was unsure if he was looking at her, she could still feel the hatred radiating off him.</p><p>The cooing and the flapping wings of owls made her raise her gaze to watch the birds swoop into the Hall, finding their respective owners to deliver mail. She was surprised when her own owl - a dark grey barn owl with white-tipped feathers named Pancake - land next to her plate with a small package attached to his leg.</p><p>With a soft touch, she scratched Pancake's head and smiled brightly when his eyes closed in content. Gwen gently pried the package from his foot, and he gave a goodbye coo before flying off.</p><p>Aware of the few stares of students around her as nobody got packages on their first day, she gently turned the paper-bound delivery. There was no return address or name to indicate who it was from, only her name and a single line of writing.</p><p>
  <em>Open alone.</em>
</p><p>With a crease between her brows, she watched as the text melted into the page, leaving only her name. Her fingers itched to open the gift but she resisted, for reasons unbeknownst to her trusting the words. She placed the package in the inner pocket of her robes, thankfully small enough to comfortably rest inside.</p><p>"What'd you get?" James asked, leaning over with curiosity when it disappeared behind her robes. Gwen's gaze snapped up and the black-haired boy drew back, holding his hands up. "Jeez, I was just wondering."</p><p>"Careful, Prongs," Sirius said around a mouthful of waffles. "She'll kick your arse for talking to her."</p><p>"<em>She</em>," Gwen exaggerated, turning her glare to Sirius, "can hear you. And <em>she</em> didn't ask for you to sit here. There's enough room for you to go elsewhere."</p><p>"Oh, but you're such pleasant company," Sirius remarked. "Godric knows why Evans likes you."</p><p>"Sirius," Remus warned.</p><p>"I guess it's because I know when to shut up."</p><p>"Cat's got claws." He grinned menacingly. "You gonna tattle to your Death Eater brother?"</p><p>"Padfoot." James gently nudged his friend.</p><p>"You'd know a thing or two about that, wouldn't you?"</p><p>Sirius' expression turned as dark as hers.</p><p>"Now, now, students," a calm voice interjected before wands could be drawn. A man, the new Professor Gwen didn't catch the name of, slid behind Sirius with his black robes sweeping the floor. The students around them were quick to quieten, turning their ears to eavesdrop. "I hope we're not causing trouble already, Mr Black, Miss Crouch." He fitted his cold gaze between the two as they stared daggers at one another. "I do not wish to use a counter-curse this early in the year, nor do I want to send anybody to Madame Pomfrey. At least pretend to get along for your house's sake. Am I understood?"</p><p>Gwen nodded sharply and Sirius grumbled something akin to, "<em>Yes, Professor</em>." Satisfied, he spun away with a flare and moved to the Slytherin table.</p><p>"Well, that was awkward," James joked in an attempt to alleviate the tension. He suddenly jolted like he'd been kicked. "<em>Ah!</em>"</p><p>"Read the room, Prongs," Peter whispered, even though the group could hear it. Gwen barely did.</p><p>
  <em>Death Eater brother.</em>
</p><p>Remus' elbow brushed against the fabric of her robes, trying to catch her attention. "Gwen?" he asked.</p><p>She caught Sirius' dramatic eye roll and abruptly pushed herself up off the bench, swinging her leg over the wood with her lips pressed together. Without a word, she grabbed her knapsack and stormed out of the Great Hall.</p><p>Gwen walked to her shared dorm and plopped herself on her bed with her back to the wall. With a flick of her wand, she shut the curtains surrounding her bed and cast a silencing spell.</p><p>She thunked her head against the wall, squeezing her eyes shut as she swallowed.</p><p><em>Death Eater</em>. The words stung her more than <em>blood-traitor</em>, more than any horrid name Malfoy had ever called her and he had his creative moments. It was hard enough being closely related to the Minister of Magic but it was an entirely different thing to have a rumoured Death Eater brother, whom you were once close with.</p><p>It was easy to react with anger, to threaten those who mocked her and her parents. She made a name for herself and though she wasn't proud of it, it at least made the majority of students avoid her. Every time she drew her wand, every time she uttered a threat and every time she served detention, she could feel a small piece of herself chipping away. Malfoy didn't help with his superiority complex, believing that she'd never hurt him because of his family.</p><p>Gwen hated to admit it but he was right. If her Father ever caught wind of her harming a Malfoy and risking his stellar reputation as the Minister further... she couldn't even imagine how he'd react. At mere threats towards the boy, she'd been shouted at and hit. He even drew his wand on one occasion in a fit of rage, but Mother was quick to calm the situation. She told Barty to take Gwen to the park so she could deal with Father's wrath alone.</p><p><em>Barty</em>.</p><p>She’d loved him once. Truly loved him. More than anybody in her life - even Mother. He was never embarrassed to hang out with his little sister at Hogwarts and he'd even ditch his friends for her, walk with her to Hogsmeade and buy her presents. He was the one that taught her hexes and jinxes when he found out she was being bullied, and he even threatened Malfoy on more than one occasion.</p><p>Gwen was furious when she found out he beat up a boy called Amycus Carrow for locking her in a storage cupboard for a full eight hours. He was caught by Dumbledore himself and the Headmaster was quick to write to their parents. Back home, after days of not seeing him, he snuck through her window in the dead of night, bruised and bloodied but he still had that damned grin on his face.</p><p>She didn't stay mad for long - she <em>couldn't</em> . She washed his face, cleaned his wounds and gave him her bed while she slept on a beanbag. He never clarified if it was Carrow or Father that hurt him that badly, but Gwen could guess.</p><p>It was easy to react with anger, but when it came to her brother she felt... <em>numb</em>. Her heart sunk and her stomach clenched at the thought of him being a Death Eater. That he was a loyal follower of Voldemort.</p><p>With a sigh, she shifted her body to lay down but something hard dug into her ribs.</p><p><em>Right</em>. The present.</p><p>She sat back up and took the plain package out of her robes. Despite it being small, it felt heavy in her hands as she peeled away the paper.</p><p>It was a golden sphere with intricate patterns ingrained in the metal. Gwen didn't get too long to admire it, as when her fingers brushed over a carved swirl it clicked open. Parts of the sphere brushed away from one another, overlapping to leave a hollow opening which held... a ring?</p><p>It was a beautiful ring. Golden like its case, it too had patterns like the sphere engraved into it. It was the stone that caught her attention however - pyramid in shape with the point positioned towards her. An opaque grey. She peered closer, seeing white marks forming at the bottom of the shape.</p><p>A circle within a vertical line within a triangle. It was interesting to look at. Beautiful, even.</p><p>She didn't recognise the symbol nor did she have any idea who would've given it to her. Barty was in hiding and Mother would have written a note along with it. Father only gave her gifts for holidays and events, but he still would've addressed it from him.</p><p>With a shake of her head, Gwen placed the ring back in the golden sphere and watched as it successfully encased the jewellery. She opened her bed's curtain and put it safely inside a hidden compartment of her trunk. Although overall bad at her studies, she had always been exceptional at Charms so she was a master of disguise.</p><p>She heard the opening of the common room door as she resealed her curtains, hoping to nap for an hour before classes started.</p><p>Gwen didn't nap. Instead, she spent her free hour laying on her side and staring at the wall blankly, listening to Lily and Alice chatting on the bed next to her. She listened without taking anything in. They were talking about Hogsmeade and what happened during the holidays - nothing to warrant Gwen's interest.</p><p>Until they started talking about her.</p><p>"Do you think Crouch's brother is really a Death Eater?" Alice asked. Gwen's heart sunk at the casual tone, the root of everything bad happening in her head being treated like gossip.</p><p>"Maybe," Lily responded. "I honestly don't know. It's not something I can really go up and ask her about, you know."</p><p>"She likes you," Alice pointed out. "Probably more than anyone in school. You're probably the only one she wouldn't hex or punch for asking."</p><p>"She's not as bad as everyone says," Lily came to her defence. Gwen couldn't help the small smile that graced her lips. "Seriously, people don't give her the time of day and they just make their own assumptions."</p><p>"I guess." Alice seemed reluctant to agree.</p><p>"Really, Al. She punched the Carrow sister for calling someone a Mudblood last year." Gwen almost jolted in surprise. She didn't know anyone knew about that besides Amycus. "She had detention for a month but still hexed Amycus when he was being a git to me."</p><p>Alice chuckled. "That was probably the best day of my life."</p><p>"Of course <em>Potter</em> got the glory for it," Lily said bitterly. "He was a right show-off about it for weeks, like I wasn't there to see that Gwen was the one that did it."</p><p>"Has he asked you to Hogsmeade yet?"</p><p>Their conversation drifted to James and Gwen zoned it out, recalling the story.</p><p>She remembered Alecto Carrow and her friends had Frank Longbottom against a wall with their wands pointed at him, threatening to curse him. It wasn't too long after Barty left, so when she heard them call him a Mudblood she was especially furious. She didn't even think to grab her wand, finding that simply decking the girl worked wonders. Alecto tattled to McGonagall with a bloodied nose and bust lip. Gwen didn't try to deny it which earned her a handful of detentions.</p><p>It was a month later and Amycus was still bitter about Barty beating him up and Gwen hitting his sister, so he cornered her outside Charms one day in front of their class. He was making fun of Lily and while James was close to hexing the boy, Gwen got there first. She pulled out her wand, shrunk his nose and used the bat-bogey hex. Since James had his wand out before Gwen everyone assumed it was James who set the hex. The fact that they were both skilled at non-verbal casting didn't help, but at least Gwen didn't have another month's worth of detentions on her head. James was proud to take her punishment.</p><p>Amycus was the laughing stock of the school for weeks when he rolled on the floor and cried, so it was worth it. Neither Carrow sibling had bothered her since then.</p><p>After a while, Lily and Alice left for Potions, a class they once again shared.</p><p>Gwen made her way there not too long after they left, only a couple of minutes late.</p><p>Slughorn ceased whatever he was saying when Gwen opened the classroom's door, greeting her with a smile. "Miss Crouch!" he exclaimed brightly. "It's good of you to join us today." Gwen was already hovering over an empty seat at the back but the Professor stopped her with an arm wave vaguely directed at the front of the room. "Take a seat next to Miss Evans and we'll get started."</p><p><em>Merlin</em>.</p><p>She ignored the stares of her classmates as she walked past them. Remus, Sirius and James were at the back, close to where Gwen would've sat. Remus had his head buried in his textbook, lost in his own world and Sirius predictably didn't turn to acknowledge her. James, to her surprise, gave a little wave over Sirius' shoulder.</p><p>She ignored the gesture with a frown, throwing her bag down as she took the seat next to Lily. The redhead nodded at her with a smile which Gwen returned, if a little awkwardly. Alice was sitting next to Lily and had Marlene on her left.</p><p>Slughorn continued the class, eager and excitable as always as he talked about the new curriculum. Lily was taking notes at an astonishing pace and Gwen found herself more interested in that than class. It was genuinely impressive how quickly she wrote.</p><p>"Now, you'll be split into pairs to start the Draught of Peace," Slughorn announced. Half the glass groaned. "You can choose your own partners, don’t worry. I'm not here to coddle you in your fifth-year, so expect more brewing and more homework. The concoction is pages 55-58 in your textbook."</p><p>Lily nudged Gwen as everyone began moving to find their respective partners. "Hey, wanna be partners?"</p><p>Gwen snapped her attention to the girl. "What?" she said dumbly.</p><p>"Marlene and Alice are pairing off," Lily explained, "and I figured it'd be easier since we're next to each other. Less moving about."</p><p>"Um." Gwen suddenly felt like a complete idiot.<em> You've partnered before, dumbass</em>. "Yeah, sure. Let me, uh..."</p><p>"I'll get the ingredients," she assured her. "You can fill the cauldron with water. Up to the third line, I think, but you might want to double check." Lily spun on her heel and left to grab the necessary ingredients.</p><p>It was the third line, as if Lily Evans could ever get anything wrong. She waved her wand and water spilled out the tip, filling the cauldron to the appropriate amount.</p><p>They worked in mostly silence once Lily returned, the only words spoken being when she told Gwen what to do. They were ahead of everyone else, of course, even Remus who was working with James, as Sirius partnered and flirted with a Ravenclaw girl.</p><p>Gwen was twirling her wand with disinterest, mixing the concoction and waiting until it turned purple. Right now it was in the midst of a pearl blue, which Lily assured was supposed to happen.</p><p>Lily was reading the instructions for the dozenth time. Gwen would assume it was simply her nature as a top student, but she worked with her enough last year to know better. Her fingers were tapping against the page as she bit her lip, eyes darting across the words. Gwen didn't want to force her to say whatever was on her mind, so she pretended not to notice.</p><p>After a few minutes, Lily pushed the book on the table and turned to the girl.</p><p>"Gwen?"</p><p>"Hm?"</p><p>"I'm..." Lily struggled to find the right words. Her eyebrows were pulled together, fingers still tapping. "I'm sorry about what everyone's saying about you, about... about your brother." Gwen frowned, which she was quick to notice. "I don't want you to think I don't like you or anything like that. It's..." Lily sighed. "It's hard for people to get it. Even me. My parents are muggles and yours are the most important people in the wizarding world, so you're pretty public." She laughed softly. </p><p>"Honestly,” she continued, “I don't know if you even like me. It's fine if you don't - I know I can be overbearing sometimes, but I want you to know that I'm here for you." A beat passed. "I do owe you after everyone you've hexed for me."</p><p>Gwen couldn't help but smile.</p><p>Lily lit up.</p><p>"Shrinking Carrow's nose before casting the bat-bogey hex?" she recalled. "I know I'm a Prefect now, but I can't deny how brilliant it was. Potter wishes he has that level of genius."</p><p>"Thank you," Gwen said quietly. She opened and closed her mouth, unsure how to go about this. "I... I don't."</p><p>"Hm?"</p><p>"Hate you," she clarified, swallowing thickly. It felt like the words were trapped in her throat and she had to force them out. "I don't hate you. And you don't owe me anything."</p><p>"Well, that's a relief." Lily's smile was soft, warm, and she gave a friendly nudge to Gwen's shoulder. "You know, I- hey, what's wrong?" She caught Gwen's flinch when her elbow touched her tender arm.</p><p>"Nothing," she said, turning her eyes back to the potion. It was becoming violet, but not quite the right purple.</p><p>"Was it Malfoy?" Lily questioned. "I overheard Remus talking about it in the common room."</p><p>Gwen shrugged it off. "It's just a bruise. It'll go."</p><p>"You should see Madame Pomfrey about it," she recommended. "It won't be a bother to heal. I can even do it if you want."</p><p>"Really, Lily, it's okay," she assured the redhead. She gestured to the cauldron. "Here, is this the right colour yet?"</p><p>Gwen knew it wasn't there yet but Lily humoured her anyway. Still, Gwen could feel her concerned gaze.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I figured I'd do a different take than what I usually read with Marauders fics and I think it's going well so far. I have the majority of this story planned and a lot of it is developing relationships but Sirius x OC is the central one. Sirius is being a knob but don't worry, our local furry will learn (sorry for the use of the word furry).</p><p>I won't be doing many A/N's unless I feel it's necessary, but I hope you enjoyed! If you have any recommendations, I'm more than happy to hear them:)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gwen was surprised to find herself having a nice time for the rest of Potions, talking to Lily as they finished the Draught of Peace. Well, it was more Lily talking to her and doing the work, but Gwen spoke a lot more in that hour than she had done the entire week. </p><p>Her chest was warm and she felt relaxed. She was slow to realise that the feeling was happiness; that she was actually enjoying herself for the first time in a long time. She even spent the majority of class without a single thought towards her brother or Father.</p><p>Remus approached Lily when the two left the classroom, asking if he could pull the redhead aside for a second while his friends walked in the other direction. Lily seemed like she didn't want to leave but Gwen insisted that it was okay. So, when they parted ways and Gwen walked down the corridor with a smile on her face, reality doused her like a cold bucket of water.</p><p>"Crouch," a voice hissed before she was roughly shoved in an alcove. Her head thudded off the wall and her cry of pain was muffled by a hand over her mouth. "Be quiet." Gwen's eyes narrowed as they met those of Malfoy's. "Now, I'm gonna talk and you're gonna- <em>ugh</em>-" He flung his hand from her mouth, face twisting in disgust. "Did you just <em>lick</em> me?"</p><p>"Don't you <em>ever</em>," she said, chest heaving, "put your hand on my mouth again." She brought her hands up and shoved him away, thankful for the momentary distraction as he was easily pushed back. She wiped her tongue on the back of her hand to rid the taste of damp skin as her head throbbed. "What the hell is wrong with you, Malfoy?"</p><p>Though the blonde didn't invade her space again, he still leered too close for comfort. "What was in that package?" he questioned.</p><p>Gwen's eyebrows scrunched together. "What?" she asked incredulously. "You threw me into a bloody wall to ask about a <em>ring?</em>"</p><p> "A ring?" Malfoy echoed. He relaxed some and that ugly mocking sneer made its way onto his expression. "Present from your boyfriend, then?" He scoffed. "I feel sorry for the poor guy that has to pretend to love someone like you." It was right then that Gwen realised his group of cronies weren't tailing him, otherwise she would've heard them laugh at his jab.</p><p>"Like you know anything about love, Malfoy," she bit back.</p><p>His expression darkened. "At least my Father isn't a blood-traitor," he taunted.</p><p>Gwen's eyes fluttered shut as she clenched her jaw, praying to Merlin that the Slytherin boy would just disappear. It took every inch of her willpower to not punch his pale face. Father would have her head if she did.</p><p>"What?" Malfoy continued with a laugh. "Nothing to say, Crouch? Your Mudblood friend isn't here to defend you now, is she? You and your-"</p><p>Malfoy couldn't finish his sentence before Gwen lunged at him, shoving him against the opposite wall like he did to her. The front of his shirt was twisted in her fist and her wand was in hand, pushed under his jaw.</p><p>"One more word," she growled. He grunted as she pushed him further back, "and I'll make sure you never speak again." His eyelids twitched into a flinch and his hands were trembling where they gripped her upper arms, trying to push her away.</p><p>"Miss Crouch," a cold yet familiar voice reached her ears. "If you could let go of Mr Malfoy." Black robes slid in her peripheral and she felt the brush of air against her skin as he loomed over them. "Now."</p><p>Contorting her lips into a snarl, she pulled herself away from the other student.</p><p>"Put away your wand," the new Professor ordered. Gwen did as he said. "Mr Malfoy." He turned his attention to the blonde. "I do not wish to take house points from my own house, but I will if I have to. I will not tolerate such abhorrent slurs in my presence. Understood?"</p><p>Malfoy turned bright red and he lowered his head in embarrassment. "Yes, sir."</p><p>The Professor nodded curtly. "Good." His dark eyes turned to Gwen. "Follow me, Miss Crouch."</p><p>He led her through the mostly empty corridors to the DADA classroom located in the North Tower, drifting up the twirling stairs with ease while Gwen lagged behind. He didn't seem to care as he waited patiently for her at the top. Without a word still, he turned and led her through the classroom into his office.</p><p>The office was spacious but not large. It was rather bare without much personalisation; the only things catching Gwen's attention being the nameplate on his desk that read <em>Augustus Rookwood</em> and a cage settled next to the plate, holding some kind of creature. She would have mistaken it for an owl if not for the bright pink feathers and glowing bulbs protruding from the top of its head and tip of its tail.</p><p>Professor Rookwood noticed what held her attention and settled himself on the edge of his desk. "A Fowler," he told her. Gwen turned her gaze to him but his eyes were on the owl- the Fowler. "A gift from Kettleburn, though I believe it was Hagrid's idea." He hummed like he was considering something. "Their feathers are often used for quills, but they are known for driving any listener insane with their screech." <em>Screech?</em> Gwen's eyes widened. "No need to worry, Miss Crouch, she came with a silencing charm."</p><p>"Oh," she said softly, taking a cautious step closer to the cage. The creature's eyes were bright yellow, beautiful with orange and hazel flecks buried by the iris' as she stared with interest, like she was assessing the human in awe of her. "What's her name?"</p><p>"Elalia." <em>A pretty name for a pretty creature</em>, Gwen thought. "She seems to like you," he observed. She couldn't decipher his expression or tone. "But we're not here to study Care of Magical Creatures."</p><p>Gwen averted her eyes, clenching her jaw. "He threw me into a wall," she defended herself. "He called Lily a-"</p><p>"- a Mudblood," Rookwood finished with a small nod. "Yes. A disgusting word from a prejudiced child. As proud as I am to be a Slytherin, seeing students insulting and distancing themselves from other houses due to their blood status is exhausting to witness."</p><p>The girl almost did a double-take. "But... you-?"</p><p>"I'm half-blood, Miss Crouch," he answered her unasked question. To say that she was surprised would be an understatement. The way he held himself and addressed others, even in the very few interactions she had with him, screamed <em>'pureblood and proud!'</em>. </p><p>"I grew up in a Muggle neighbourhood with a Muggle Father and Muggle neighbours," he continued to explain. "I was friends with Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws alike in the time I attended Hogwarts." His thin lips pulled into an amused smile as he studied her puzzled face. "I'm sure it's difficult to believe but I know what it's like to be an outcast at Hogwarts, Miss Crouch. To be called a blood-traitor at every given moment."</p><p>"I don't care about being called a blood-traitor," Gwen said. "I've been hearing it since first-year."</p><p>"Yet you always react the same upon hearing it. With anger," Rookwood pointed out. The girl crossed her arms and turned her eyes to the ground. "I'm not saying I truly understand what it's like to be in your shoes. My parents were not influential people and my brother was not a wizard." Gwen felt her mood drop like an anchor. "That's what I mean, Miss Crouch. You react with anger at the mere mention of him." She hadn't noticed her knuckles were turning white with the way she clenched her fists.</p><p>"You don't know what it's like," she said with a shake of her head, forcibly loosening her grip on her hands. "Everyone's saying he's a- he's..."</p><p>"I know," Rookwood interjected softly, sympathetically. "I'll be honest, I was going to find you at some point today. It just so happened that I ran into your... <em>altercation</em> with Lucius." Gwen looked up at him again as he pushed himself off his desk, hands clasped behind his back as he observed a small painting she hadn't noticed before, hidden beside a cabinet. It was of a woman - a beautiful young woman with blonde hair that ran like a waterfall over her shoulders. She was laughing at something behind the camera, her smile bright and genuine.</p><p>"Who is she?" Gwen asked, voice quiet as she stepped closer to watch the moving picture. Although in black and white, she could feel the vibrance radiating off her.</p><p>"My mother," Rookwood answered with a slight smile. "She is the one that taught me how to deal with bullies and I wish to impart the same wisdom to you." He paused, shifting his focus to Gwen. "For example, if you happened to use the tongue-tying hex, or even the confusion hex if confronted in public... I would perhaps look in the other direction."</p><p>Her eyes left the painting to stare dumbly at the Professor. "You'd... You'd ignore it?"</p><p>He raised his eyebrows like she asked a ridiculous question. "I can't ignore something I can't see, now, can I?" he said. "If Flitwick's praises about your non-verbal casting are correct, then nobody can see who set the hex. Or if there was a hex to begin with. We all know the Malfoys have the flair for dramatics, after all."</p><p>Gwen bit the inside of her cheek to hide her smile. "Of course."</p><p>He hummed. "Do you have class now?"</p><p>"Yes," she answered. "Transfiguration with McGonagall."</p><p>"I'll send a letter informing her you're with me," he told her. "Unfortunately, I will still have to give you detention. Every Monday for a month, 6 p.m. for an hour, we can practice the tongue-tying hex. Probably more, since you're a fast learner in Charms."</p><p>"I..." Gwen took in a deep breath, trying not to seem ungrateful. "Thank you for being so nice to me, sir, but I... I don't understand? No offense, but DADA isn't my favourite subject. I failed last year and didn't show up to most of my classes, so I'm confused."</p><p>He didn't look offended in the slightest. No, his eyes sparkled similarly to Dumbledore's like he knew something she didn't. "I believe you can achieve great things if nudged in the right direction," he answered truthfully. "You're not a problem child, Miss Crouch, nor do I think you're an idiot for failing or skipping classes. Intelligence is more than just good grades." He smiled at her again, a little wider than his usual smiles when Gwen was left speechless. "Now, unless you wish to get back to your dorm, we can begin your first lesson in advanced hexing."</p><p>So Gwen stayed, feeling like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.</p><hr/><p>Remus had few regrets in life.</p><p>Yelling at his mum, the odd argument with his dad, and accidentally hurting his friends during his transformation always put him in a low mood for the rest of the week, no matter how small the injury.</p><p>None of that compared to chasing after a fuming Lily Evans, though.</p><p>When he pulled her aside after Potions, his intentions were mostly pure. He'd noticed over the years that her and Gwen were friends, or at least talked regularly in class, and it was no different watching them interact in Potions. Remus didn't think he'd seen Gwen smile so sincerely in the time they've been at Hogwarts together, not since third-year. That might not say much since she didn't have friends, but it was nice seeing her happy after witnessing her almost cry on the train earlier.</p><p>But his mood was quick to drop when Sirius kept making snide remarks about the girl.</p><p>
  <em>"How long do you think before she follows her brother, Prongs?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“What hex should I use?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Bloody purebloods thinking they can get away with anything."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Why is Evans even chatting with her?"</em>
</p><p>It annoyed the hell out of Remus.</p><p>He loved Sirius like a brother and trusted him with his life. He understood that his family was awful - hell, he spent a weekend at the Black Manor and wanted to throttle them upon their first meeting. They turned their noses up at him once they found out he was half-blood, and after an awkward dinner which consisted mostly of a back-and-forth between Sirius and Walburga, with Orion and Regulus occasionally chiming in, they ended up going back to Remus'. He never returned after that.</p><p>So, he understood and he sympathised. But that didn't mean he approved of his unwarranted scorn for Gwen.</p><p>Remus had to bite his cheek and hold back snapping at him for his remarks, only breaking the façade for a moment to tell him not to actually hex her. James looked uncomfortable with the comments too but didn't say anything.</p><p>Instead of having a go at Sirius, Remus pulled Lily aside after class and let her know that his friend was being an ass. He wanted to make sure that Lily would be there for her with the rumours of her brother starting and students, namely Malfoy, harassing her tenfold. If Gwen was going to mingle in their group then it would be best for Lily to pull Gwen away. Maybe it wasn't the smartest or most well-thought decision, but he didn't anticipate much to come from it.</p><p>He certainly wasn't expecting to witness the pure unadulterated <em>Evans Rage.</em></p><p>With Remus running after her, she stormed into the Gryffindor common room where Sirius and James were chatting and laughing.</p><p>She smacked Sirius hard on the head with her textbook.</p><p>"<em>Ow!</em>" he yelled. The <em>thud </em>made Remus flinch while Sirius spun around on the couch, hand gripping his head where he was hit. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you, Evans-? <em>What-?</em>" She smacked him with the book again, this time on the shoulder as he shot up off the sofa. "What did I do?!"</p><p>"<em>What did you do?!</em>" she repeated in a shout. "If I need to bloody spell it out for you, then-" She lifted her textbook.</p><p>"Okay, okay!" Sirius backed up, holding his hands up. The girl lowered her weapon. "I'm extremely sorry for what I did and I promise I'll never do it again!"</p><p>"Sirius," she said. "Please tell me what you're sorry for."</p><p>"Um." He at least had the audacity to look guilty. "For being me?"</p><p>Lily scoffed. "Nice try. Now tell me why you're being an arse to Gwen?"</p><p>"<em>Crouch?</em>" Sirius near-yelled incredulously. "Why do you...?" His eyes darted to Remus. "What the bloody hell did you say to her, Moony?"</p><p>Remus shrugged nonchalantly, sitting down on a nearby chair to witness the scene.</p><p>"Hi, Lily," James decided to pipe up.</p><p>"Hi," she said curtly and turned her attention back to Sirius. "Why are you being an arse to her, Sirius?"</p><p>His eyes went wide like he couldn't believe what she was saying. "<em>What- she- her-</em> her brother's a <em>Death Eater</em>, Lily!"</p><p>"So is yours," she pointed out.</p><p>"She doesn't do anything to discourage the rumours, does she?" he retorted. "Oh, she cried a bit when Malfoy was a dick to her?" He shook his head. "Cry me a bloody river like she doesn't have all the money and influence in the world to tell people her brother isn't one. She hasn't said a damn thing about it so I'm <em>oh-so-sorry</em> I don't believe she doesn't at least sympathise with <em>You-Know-Who.</em>"</p><p>Lily hit him again, using both hands as leverage and not giving Sirius enough time to dodge. He yelped in surprise or pain, Remus couldn't tell.</p><p>"Using your tiny little pathetic brain, you <em>prat</em>, tell me why the bloody hell you think Malfoy is always a twat to her?"</p><p>"Because apparently her dad's a blood-traitor?" he answered. "I don't know, Lily. Isn't she supposed to be <em>your</em> friend?"</p><p>The redhead's eyes fluttered shut momentarily, composing herself with a heavy breath. "Who do you think hexed Carrow when he was insulting my family?" she asked.</p><p>"Prongs," Sirius answered confidently. He turned to his friend who was quick to avert his gaze, guilty. "Right?"</p><p>"<em>Uhhh</em>."</p><p>Remus pinched the bridge of his nose. "James," he murmured.</p><p>"I never technically said I did it - everyone there just thought I did!" James crossed his arms defensively.</p><p>Sirius looked heartbroken. "What happened to bro code?"</p><p>"I'm sorry, bro," James whispered sadly.</p><p>Lily rolled her eyes. "It was Gwen, <em>genius</em>," she reiterated, interrupting the two. "She did the hex, and she decked his sister for calling Frank a Mudblood. She didn't do it to save face or because there was an audience. She did it because she actually cares."</p><p>Remus straightened at that. He didn't know she hexed Amycus and he definitely did not know she was the one who punched Alecto. Although the Carrow girl was quick to blame Frank since she didn't see who did, nobody believed that Longbottom had the gall to hit her like that. He took what was given to him and never complained so Dumbledore left the incident unpunished.</p><p>Remus shouldn't have been shocked to find out James was lying about hexing Amycus, though, just disappointed. He needed to have a word with his friend.</p><p>"How the hell did you know it was her?" Sirius questioned. "Both times?"</p><p>"Frank told Alice what happened and she told me," Lily explained. "And it was obviously Gwen who set the hex. James didn't even have his wand out and she left before any teachers could get there."</p><p>Sirius deflated a little, eyebrows drawn together. "It was really Crouch?" he asked.</p><p>"Yes," she confirmed. "She never talks about her family because I'm pretty sure she hates them, Sirius, just like you hate yours. Have you ever seen her look proud whenever someone brings up her brother? Or happy when her dad is mentioned? In the years I've known her she only looks relaxed in Charms or when I'm talking to her about nonsense."</p><p>"Padfoot," James, to everyone's surprise, spoke up. "Not much of a shocker, but I agree with Lily. Maybe you could be more... chill with her? Like, you don't have to be friends with her or anything but Moony and Lily like her and they have good taste, if I do say so myself." He sent a wink Lily's way which she rolled her eyes at, but Remus could see the softness in her eyes.</p><p>"He's right," Remus piped up.</p><p>Sirius blew a dramatic breath. "Fine, fine," he said. "Okay. I'll be nice, then. Anyone who can deck a Carrow is decent in my books, I suppose, and since you and Moony seem to be in love with her..." he sighed, "I trust you. I'll give her a chance."</p><p>Lily dropped her textbooks on the table Remus was sat at, satisfied. "Good. That's all I wanted to hear." She nodded and sat down. "Remus, are you still up for studying?"</p><p>He smiled. "Sure."</p><p>Always trust Lily to get the job done.</p><hr/><p>The common room was bustling by the time Gwen returned, filled almost to the brim with students finishing up their first-day studies. She spent a good portion of her Transfiguration period with Professor Rookwood while he taught her the tongue-tying hex. It was amusing to watch the usually stoic man mixing his words and slurring every time Gwen cast it, though he was always quick to use the deflection spell to cease it.</p><p>He was right though - she was a fast learner. Always had been when it came to things like Charms and hexes, just like her Mother when she was a student. Gwen had mastered the lesson by the time she left his office but he wanted her to perfect it in her detention next Monday.</p><p>She ended up spending her next and final class, Care of Magical Creatures, in the Astronomy Tower alone. It was where she spent a good chunk of her time when she skipped classes or needed alone time outside of her dorm. She was one of the few students who knew the secret passage to the tower, thumping the back of the knight statue's head three times and stepping on his right foot. Though Sinistra never minded if she caught Gwen there, she always kicked her out if she had a class next period. She understood without needing to say a word.</p><p>"Hey, Crouch!" a voice calling her name behind her made her jump and dark hair invaded her vision. Sirius threw a hand on her shoulder which Gwen was quick to slap away. "Um-"</p><p>"What do you want?" she asked, turning to face him.</p><p>"I just came to apologise," he said, to her astonishment. He took her startled silence as an opportunity to continue. "I know I've been a prick to you, and, um... Moony and Lily had a word with me and I realise you don't deserve it. You've already got Malfoy on your arse, no need to add to that list, right?" He chuckled. The flash of his white teeth brought her out of her stupor and she furrowed her eyebrows at him. "So... I'm sorry."</p><p>Gwen's lip parted. "You're...?"</p><p>"... Sorry?" he finished, a little reluctantly.</p><p>"Um." Gwen frowned. <em>Why in Merlin was he apologising to her?</em> "Okay."</p><p>Sirius shifted. "You know, when someone says they're sorry, it's common courtesy to say that they're forgiven."</p><p>"Do you... want to be forgiven?" she asked.</p><p>The boy's lip turned up into a charming smile. "That depends if you want to forgive me?"</p><p>
  <em>Merlin, Gwen, just leave!</em>
</p><p>"I..." She blinked. "Yes."</p><p>He raised his eyebrows. "Yes?"</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>"Okay. Great." He grinned with a nod. "Listen, I gotta go. Working on something with Prongs, but we'll talk later, yeah?"</p><p>He turned and left Gwen standing in the middle of the room like an idiot, lips parted in confusion.</p><p>Glancing to where he went, she saw him jump over the couch to sit between James and Peter, chatting animatedly about something. She caught Lily's eye where she was studying with Remus and the redhead sent a smile in her direction, lifting her fingers up in a little wave. Remus saw this and waved her over.</p><p>Gwen's frown deepened and she felt stuck for a moment, her feet unable to lift from the carpeted floor.</p><p>Everyone was being nice to her. <em>Why was everyone being so nice to her?</em></p><p>It wasn't until a second-year knocked into her by accident and mumbled an apology that she rushed off to her room.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A lot of this story is going completely against canon, I should point out. And thank you for the kind comments being left already - it means the world!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Her dreams were plagued with darkness that night. Flashes of red tore through her vision and she heard screaming - a sound that made her blood run cold and the hair on the back of her neck stand on edge. It was more vivid than any dream she's ever had, like she was there but her vision was obscured, broken only by the flashes. She felt weightless, like she was floating, unable to feel her own body. Not even her feet were grounded.</p><p>Gwen woke up in a cold sweat, her clothes sticking uncomfortably to her skin. Her heart was thudding against her chest, thumping her ribcage so hard she could feel it vibrating through her body.</p><p>Sitting up and pulling aside the curtain surrounding her bed, Gwen checked the grandfather clock to see it was almost 2 a.m. She sighed, running her fingers through her messy hair and resisting the urge to scream into her duvet. Looked like she wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight.</p><p>Though there was always one thing that would make her feel better.</p><p>Hot chocolate.</p><p>She needed hot chocolate.</p><p>She climbed out of bed, careful to stay quiet as to not wake her roommates. Gentle snoring could be heard from Alice's bed and though the other beds were quiet, the curtains were all drawn so she presumed they were all still asleep. Alice probably forgot to put a silencing charm around hers.</p><p>Gwen stayed light on her feet as she changed into shorts and a shirt. She held her wand and watched as it softly lit up, keeping her thoughts quiet so it wouldn't accidentally turn into a blinding light that would wake everyone in the room. She kept it lowered as she descended the stairs of the tower, though a few of the portraits hanging on the walls grumbled at her. She mumbled apologies to them under her breath.</p><p>She slowed down and drew her eyebrows together when she saw light coming from the common room. She sometimes ran into other students if she was awake at this time but it was rare, unless there was a party then Gwen usually avoided leaving her room altogether. It was strange for someone to be awake, especially on a Tuesday at 2 a.m.</p><p>She stepped through the archway at the end of the stairs, keeping her feet light. Two heads of hair were hunched over what looked like a piece of parchment, their backs to her as they spoke in low voices.</p><p>It was Remus and Sirius. Of course.</p><p>The light of her wand faded and she moved to the kitchenette. She levitated the kettle to the stove and cast <em>Aguamenti</em> to fill it with water. It wasn't until the sound of flames she conjured echoed through the room did the boys realise they weren't alone.</p><p>"Who is that?" Sirius asked, straightening his back.</p><p>She glanced over her shoulder to see their heads perked, squinting in her direction. "I'm not gonna tattle about whatever you're doing," she said. "I'll be gone in a minute. Don't worry."</p><p>"Gwen?" Remus asked. "What are you doing awake at this time?"</p><p>"I could ask you the same question," the girl remarked, moving towards the fireplace. She didn't miss how Sirius hovered over the parchment him and Remus were working on as she drew closer. Her eyes rolled. As if she cared whatever antics they were up to.</p><p>She flicked her wand and a brick to the left of the mantelpiece came loose, hovering in the air.</p><p>"What...?" Sirius muttered as she reached in the hole, grabbing a sachet of hot chocolate. "Did she...?"</p><p>She heard the brick fall back into place as she made her way back to the now whistling kettle, using <em>Accio</em> to bring a plain mug towards her.</p><p>"Is that <em>Conjure Cocoa?!</em>" Sirius yelled, appearing suddenly behind her.</p><p>"Merlin, Black!" she exclaimed, holding a hand over her chest. "Do you want to wake the whole bloody castle screaming like that?"</p><p>"Sorry," he apologised, not sounding it at all. "Where the hell did you get<em> Conjure Cocoa</em> from? It's only sold in America!"</p><p>Gwen swiped her wand and the flames underneath the kettle vanished. "My Father is the Minister of Magic," she reminded him as she levitated the kettle to pour water in the mug. "He's friends with the Headmaster at Ilvermorny and they like sending each other gifts."</p><p>Her eyes moved to Sirius and he looked both in awe and confused. He watched her pour the sachet into the chocolate and charm a spoon to mix it together. "How much do you have? How-" He spun around then. "How the hell did you keep it hidden there?"</p><p>Gwen blinked and he was gone, darting towards where she hid her stash and bending down to analyse the bricks.</p><p>"Um." Remus approached her then, awkwardly crossing his arms over his chest. "Hi, again."</p><p>Gwen sent him a small smile. "Hello."</p><p>"Can't sleep?"</p><p>Her smile quickly faded, recalling the woman's screams and red flashes. "Something like that," she answered, turning her head away from him. "You up to no good again, Prefect?"</p><p>Remus' lip twitched into a smile. "It's better to know what my friends are up to than be kept in the dark," he said. "I... try not to encourage them."</p><p>"So you're up at this time helping Sirius study, then?" she asked.</p><p>"Something like that," he replied. Gwen couldn't help but laugh softly at that. She'd never understand why McGonagall let him be Prefect with his group of friends.</p><p>"Hey, Crouch!" Sirius yelled from across the room. "What charm did you use?"</p><p>Remus rolled his eyes with a sigh as Gwen responded, "One you won't be able to figure out."</p><p>He scoffed, looking over his shoulder at her with narrowed eyes. "Yeah, alright. You're aware I know every counter-charm, right?"</p><p>She cocked an eyebrow at his arrogance. "Even if that were true, you'd get a nasty hex to the face if anyone but me tries to get in." Which wasn't a bluff. She remembered last year when a first-year accidentally sent a spell to the brick and he was puking slugs for hours. Gwen had to adjust and improve the charm to avoid that happening in the future. "Feel free to give it a go, though."</p><p>Sirius straightened up at that. "Is that a challenge?" His eyebrows raised and he had a dangerous glint in his eye. A glint that said he wanted to make bad decisions.</p><p>"Think of it as a warning.”</p><p>He grinned at that.</p><p>It was odd how fast the boy could go from seemingly hating her, to apologising to her after being forced to by his friends, and now him being... friendly with her? He was nice to the majority of the student body, excluding a lot of purebloods and Slytherins, but it felt weird being on the receiving end of his boyish grin.</p><p>"Hey, is that a <em>Kiss</em> shirt?" Sirius asked out of the blue.</p><p>Gwen frowned, looking down at her clothes. "<em>Kiss?</em>" she asked. The shirt had four Muggle men printed on it, very punk-looking with heavy eyeliner, white face-paint, and over-the-top wigs that she thought looked cool. They were a heavy rock band that she'd never had the chance to listen to. "Do you mean Kizz?"</p><p>"Ki- <em>Kizz?</em>" Sirius echoed with wide eyes, acting like she just grew a second head. "You call them <em>Kizz?</em>"</p><p>"Well, yeah."</p><p>"It's <em>Kiss</em>," he reiterated. "K-I-S-S." He pointed to the words on her shirt. "No Z's."</p><p>Gwen's frown deepened as she twisted her shirt to get a better look. "Then why are they shaped like backward Z's?"</p><p>"Because it's part of their aesthetic! It's supposed to look like lightning bolts- you- I- you know what?" He sighed and shook his head. He must've been a fan of them. "Never mind. What's a pureblood doing with a Muggle band on her shirt, anyway?"</p><p>"I got it when-" she cut herself off, recalling when she actually bought it. <em>When Father had too much to drink, got angry, and Barty took me to a Muggle shop to cheer me up.</em> "It was a present from one of my Mother's Muggle-born friends." Her lips pressed together as her jaw tensed.</p><p>Sirius' eyebrows drew together. "Are you-?"</p><p>"I should go," she muttered, swallowing nothing but air. Her throat felt scratchy. "Have fun with whatever you're doing." She swiped her mug and brushed past Remus to return to her room, not looking back as she ascended the stairs.</p><p>Remus and Sirius watched silently until her footsteps could no longer be heard.</p><p>Sirius looked at his friend. "Did I say something?" he asked.</p><p>"No." His friend shook his head, a gentle crease appearing between his eyebrows. "I think she's just having a bad night."</p><p>"Her mood switches just like that, huh," he commented. To anybody else's ears, the words would seem offensive, ignorant even, but Remus could tell he was concerned.</p><p>The thing about Sirius was that he was often misguided. Although he didn't inherit his family's ignorance and blatant racism, he did have a tendency to make assumptions and run with them without much thought. He hated a lot of purebloods - like he said to Lily before, he didn't like how Gwen was never obvious in her disdain for people who hated Muggles. He needed to be told outright that she did things to defend Lily, Frank and probably others, and that the harassment from Malfoy was because she was a so-called <em>blood-traitor</em>, too. Not just because of her Father.</p><p>Another thing about Sirius was that he was loyal - more loyal than anyone Remus knew. When he met James on his first day at Hogwarts, he sat with him on the train and refused to leave his side. When he saw Remus and Lily being harassed by Slytherins, he defended them and asked if they wanted to sit with him and James at lunch. When he found Peter being beaten up by a couple of third-years, Sirius sent them to the hospital wing with hexes. Ever since that eventful first day, Sirius stuck by them and never left.</p><p>He was just as protective towards people outside their immediate group. Marlene, Alice, Mary, Frank... he was similar to Gwen in that way, and Remus had an appreciation for her brashness just as he did with Sirius. There were occasions that he hated how impulsive Sirius was, when he pulled a prank without telling anyone and getting caught for it, but when it came to defending Muggle-borns and hexing the likes of Snape and Malfoy he couldn't be more grateful.</p><p>"She's been a lot more talkative this year, hasn't she?" Sirius continued, bringing Remus out of his thoughts.</p><p>He shrugged. "Maybe things are better at home now that the stuff with her brother has calmed down," he suggested. "The newspapers have eased up on her Dad, after all."</p><p>"Yeah, maybe." Sirius nodded minutely, though he didn't seem convinced. Neither did Remus, if he was being honest. "Anyway," he shook his head, snapping him out of whatever he was thinking, "we need to work on this map. I made a bet with Prongs that I can charm it to insult anyone but us that tries to open it."</p><p>"Anyone but us?" His eyebrows raised. "You mean every student and teacher at Hogwarts, including the new ones?" Sirius nodded, a wide smile on his face. Remus sighed. He really did resemble an overexcited dog sometimes. "Fine. I better get half of whatever he owes you."</p><p>"Yes!" Sirius pumped a triumphant fist in the air and planted a kiss on Remus' head. "That's five sickles each for us, Moony!"</p><hr/><p>The next morning, Gwen was exhausted. She tried going back to sleep but couldn't, the fear of revisiting her dream far more frightening than whatever punishment she would get for falling asleep in class.</p><p>She had breakfast in the common room and took time to catch up on what she missed in Transfiguration. McGonagall, despite her strictness for punctuality, had always shown kindness towards Gwen. She never berated her if she was late to class, not since second-year when Gwen actually began to take the time to catch up on classes in her free time. As long as she was prepared for the lesson there were never any issues, even if her grades weren't stellar.</p><p>Gwen ate her croissant while her eyes skimmed through the Vanishing Spell section in her textbook. A lot of it was theory which was rather boring, and she had to force her eyes to stay open as she read through the paragraphs over and over again, while her charmed quill took notes for her. Charmed quills generally were not allowed in classes unless Flitwick was feeling generous, so she always took the opportunity when nobody was around.</p><p>The common room was mostly empty, but there were a couple of sixth-years lounging on the sofas. Sean Estes and Angelica Cole, two of the Gryffindor Prefects, and the Hufflepuff Quidditch Captain, Charlie Wood.</p><p>Gwen used to attend all Quidditch matches during her first few years at Hogwarts with Barty. As they were both in Gryffindor, they had to sit on the side-lines when their house wasn't playing and resist picking favourites. Cheering for anybody but your own house in Quidditch was frowned upon and she didn't want to risk being further ostracized from her peers.</p><p>At the end of second-year during the Hogwarts Quidditch Cup, Hufflepuff won against Slytherin due to Charlie Wood, a seeker before he became Captain, catching the golden snitch. Gwen and Barty stood, shouting in victory with Hufflepuff. Neither admitted it but they sometimes enjoyed watching Hufflepuff over their own house.</p><p>When Charlie Wood swung his broom to where Gwen and Barty were cheering and handed her the snitch, Gwen was so bewildered that she couldn't find a thing to say. She could only turn to Barty who was staring daggers at the boy. Handing someone the snitch like that was often saved for romantic couples.</p><p>Charlie only laughed and winked at Gwen before flying away to celebrate with his team, leaving her covering her smile with her hand like an idiot.</p><p>Later that night, Gwen snuck out of her dorm with a group of girls to the party celebrating Hufflepuff's win. Charlie found her before she could even take a moment to admire the beauty of the common room and sat down with her on the sofa. She tried giving him the golden snitch but he refused with a smile. They chatted the entire night.</p><p>He was her first kiss, as well as the first boy that showed any real interest in her. The couple of weeks that they dated consisted of trips to Hogsmeade and kissing in hidden alcoves in the castle. The relationship - if you could even call it that - ended mutually before they left for the summer holidays. There were no hard feelings but Gwen always felt awkward in his presence after that.</p><p>Like he could sense he was being watched, Charlie's eyes left his friends and met Gwen's, pinning her to her seat. He smiled and sent a small wave towards her, to which she quickly darted her eyes away and felt a flush creeping up her neck. Merlin, he was even more handsome than she remembered.</p><p>
  <em>Time to go.</em>
</p><p>She wiped crumbs off her mouth and threw the remains of her croissant in the bin, stuffing her textbook in her knapsack. Glancing at the clock, she realised she had five minutes before Transfiguration started. She rushed out and made her way to the South Tower.</p><p>Gwen knew she had Transfiguration with Lily because of their conversation in Potions yesterday, and Lily said she'd save her seat if she was going to attend. </p><p>She opened the classroom door only to see that the seats next to the redhead were taken. One by Marlene and the other by James.</p><p>Of course.</p><p>Gwen couldn't help the crestfallen expression take over her face, nor the clench of her jaw as she tried not to react. She promised she'd save her a seat, so why...?</p><p>
  <em>You're pathetic. Stop being pathetic.</em>
</p><p>A shoulder knocking her against the doorframe snapped her back to reality when the bruise on her arm pulsed in pain. She was met with Lucius Malfoy's sneer, because of course she was.</p><p>"Get in everyone's way, why don't you," he said. "Your boyfriend's calling you over, moron."</p><p>Gwen followed Lucius' line of sight and saw Remus beckoning her over to take a seat between him and Sirius. Glancing around, she saw she only had the choice of sitting next to a Slytherin girl in front of Lucius or alone at the back, which McGonagall wouldn't allow.</p><p>So, she threw her knapsack on the ground between Sirius' and Remus' stools and took a seat.</p><p>"I tried to stop him, I promise," Remus said. "Lily said she wanted to sit with you."</p><p>She blinked.</p><p><em>Lily wanted to sit with her</em>.</p><p>Merlin, Gwen felt like an overdramatic idiot. They had a nice time yesterday and Lily was nice - she wasn't two-faced and she always showed kindness to Gwen. Godric, she was an actual <em>idiot</em>.</p><p>To prove her point, Lily turned and mouthed, '<em>sorry</em>' when she locked eyes with Gwen. She nodded to an oblivious James who was still talking and rolled her eyes, to which Gwen stifled a laugh. </p><p>"He wants to take her to Hogsmeade this weekend," Remus continued.</p><p>"Yeah, to bloody <em>Madame Puddifoots</em>," Sirius added, fake-gagging. "On Alice's advise, no less."</p><p>The only students who liked going to the tea shop were over-romantic second-years who thought they were in love. It was rare to see anybody above third-year there, besides Madame Puddifoot herself. </p><p>"That's a bad idea," she chimed in.</p><p>Sirius scoffed. "You try telling him that."</p><p>McGonagall entered at that moment, striding between the tables with her green robes flowing gracefully behind her.</p><p>She stopped and turned at the front behind her desk, narrowing her eyes at James' seating choice before snapping her eyes to Sirius at the back. The boy grinned and blew a kiss to the teacher, which she dutifully ignored.</p><p>As she began the lesson, briefly going over yesterday's lesson before going on to speak about the intricacies of the Vanishing Spell, Sirius leaned in to whisper.</p><p>"So, has anyone asked you to Hogsmeade yet?" he asked in a whisper.</p><p>She frowned, darting her eyes to make sure he was actually talking to her. "What do you think?" she asked, matching his low pitch.</p><p>"Well, your charming personality and sweet tone of voice tells me you've got guys lining up to take you."</p><p>She stared at him flatly, ignoring the amused smile on his lips. "You don't need a date to go to Hogsmeade, you know," she pointed out.</p><p>"Yeah, I know," he shrugged, "but tradition, right? Usually if a guy asks a girl then he's not just doing it as a friend."</p><p>"That's presumptuous," she muttered, before pausing. "You... Um... You're not asking me, are you?"</p><p>Sirius jolted like he'd been burned. "Merlin, no!"</p><p>"Mr. Black," McGonagall stopped her lecture to reprimand him. "If you could cease your chatter while I teach."</p><p>"Sorry, Minnie," he apologised with an easy, somewhat strained smile.</p><p>McGonagall shook her head and as soon as she turned her attention back to the class, he continued. "Um, no offence," he said. Gwen resisted rolling her eyes. "Like... don't get me wrong, you're... you're not ugly-"</p><p>"Setting the bar high," she interjected, though it hardly offended her.</p><p>"I didn't mean it like that," Sirius defended himself, chewing his lip. "I-I... Okay, you're pretty, but..." He glanced around them and leaned in closer as he lowered his voice. "I think Moony wants to ask you to Hogsmeade."</p><p>Gwen jerked away in surprise. "What?"</p><p>"Keep your voice down." He nodded his head to where Remus was listening intently to McGonagall as he wrote notes. "He talks about you a lot. I think he's sweet on you."</p><p>"Sure."</p><p>"I'm serious!" he whisper-shouted, earning the attention of their teacher once again. Instead of saying anything though, she simply raised a single eyebrow until Sirius moved away from Gwen.</p><p>She was the one to talk once McGonagall turned her back on them this time. "Just because someone's nice to you doesn't mean they're interested."</p><p>"<em>Come on,</em>" he dragged out, keeping his eyes forward like Gwen to not attract the Professor's attention. Still, he tilted his head towards her to prevent Remus from hearing. "All I want is to see my best friend happy. I don't think I've ever seen him with a girl since I've known him, and you two get along pretty well."</p><p>"And getting along pretty well doesn't mean we need to date, Sirius," she retorted. "Even if it was true, you can tell him I don't like him like that."</p><p>"Woah." His eyes widened. "You're a real heartbreaker, Crouch."</p><p>She sighed. "Gwen," she murmured under her breath.</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>She swallowed, blinking as she tilted her head to meet Sirius' gaze. "Call me Gwen," she elaborated. "I don't like Gwendolyn or Crouch."</p><p>He smiled; not quite a grin or a smirk, but something softer as he nudged her shoulder. "You got it, Gwen."</p><p>They regressed back into silence, more comfortable this time once she loosened her shoulders.</p><p>"Hey," Sirius whispered after a couple of minutes. "Are we... Are we okay, now? All forgiven?"</p><p>Gwen bit back a smile and nodded. "Yeah," she said.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Let me know if there's any mistakes and REMEMBER THIS IS SUPER SLOW-BURN! Like, it's ridiculous.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was always quiet in the library during lunch. Though there were students milling around to find textbooks they needed for class and first-years already studying far more than necessary, it was better than filled tables and Madame Pince, a new addition to the library staff, constantly shushing students. Though she appreciated her getting the students to quieten, the shushing was usually more distracting than the chatter itself.</p><p>Gwen, upon Kettleburn's advice, had the newest edition of <em>The Monster Book of Monsters</em> set on the table in front of her, open on a page about Bowtruckles. The image in the textbook showed a green stick-like insect with two leaves protruding from the top of its head, only several inches in height. It was a cute creature, if a little odd-looking.</p><p>Her quill scratched messy notes on a piece of parchment, jotting down basic information. They were territorial but otherwise peaceful and often used for picking locks. There was a note at the bottom saying Newt Scamander was the first student to gain the trust of the Bowtruckles and officially tame one. He stole one from the school grounds before leaving and called it Pickett, long before his famous adventures.</p><p>Gwen has never gotten anything above Acceptable in class, but she was glad she chose Care as one of her subjects. It was one of the more interesting ones for sure, and Newt Scamander was always a fun character to read about even if the rest of the topic was dry.</p><p>She was jolted out of her writing when her quill abruptly flew out of her hand, landing a foot away from her. Without thinking she leaned down to pick it back up before she was interjected. A hair's breadth away from her fingers, a foot stomped down on the quill, snapping it clean in half. Gwen looked up, ready to chide whoever it was.</p><p>It was Lucius, staring down his nose at her with a snide twitch of the lip. "My apologies," he said, voice lowered as not to alert the keen-eared Pince.</p><p>Gwen exhaled, pursing her lips. "Need something?" she asked, briefly eyeing her broken quill on the ground. There was a small cloud of magic where it broke, filtering up through the air.</p><p>"Just browsing," Lucius said, sounding overly-casual. He was with his usual cluster of friends; Mulciber, Avery and Evan Rosier, but Gwen noticed the black-haired boy standing behind the three, towering over them.</p><p>It was Severus Snape, Lily's old friend. She knew he was anti-Muggle - remembered when he publicly humiliated Lily by calling her a Mudblood in their third year, but she didn't connect the dots that he'd hang out with the likes of Malfoy. He was too wimpy for them.</p><p>Lucius continued, "You should be more careful with your things, Crouch."</p><p>She diverted her attention back to the blonde. "And you should watch where you're going, Malfoy," Gwen retorted. "Pissing me off is becoming a daily occurrence, huh?"</p><p>"Aw," he pouted, "is the little blood-traitor going to cry to her pathetic Father and whore Mother?"</p><p>Her annoyance was quick to spike into anger and she surged to her feet, fist curled by her hip. While his friends laughed, Lucius did something that surprised her.</p><p>He took a step back.</p><p>His arrogant expression flickered into something akin to panic, similar to when Gwen had her wand against his neck the day before. His friends couldn't see the expression but they noticed the way he stepped back, the tension in his shoulders, and their laughter was quick to fade.</p><p>She hesitated for a second, her lips parting as the crease between her eyebrows softened. Her anger turned into confusion. </p><p>Lucius took advantage of her hesitation. His air of fear melted into amusement. "Hah," he chuckled. "Are you scared of hurting me, Crouch?" He was still being quiet, but his voice raised enough to gain the attention of a few students around them. "Your Father may be the Minister of Magic but we all know mine is pulling the strings," he continued. "Your Father is weak - <em>soft</em>. He doesn't deserve his position. He probably wouldn't be Minister if it wasn't for my family."</p><p>Gwen recalled many years ago, long before he became the Minister, her Father voicing his hatred for the Malfoy family after having dinner with them. That was when he was only an official and Eugenia Jenkins was the Minister, not too long before she died of Dragon Pox. He hated the Malfoys, muttering every curse he could think of towards them when he arrived home. If he could find positives in the Black family, Gwen could only come to the conclusion that the Malfoys were a different breed of awful.</p><p>"I'll keep that in mind," Gwen said. "Do you want to break any more of my things while you're here?"</p><p>Lucius smirked and it seemed dark, threatening. "Not this time," he said. "Have fun with Evans, Crouch. See how long she'll stick around." Then he left. His friends followed, not before Snape sent a withering look over his shoulder.</p><p>Gwen wanted to think that it was another one of his empty words, but it seemed different. He was clearly scared of being hurt by her so why was he so insistent on bothering her and sending vague threats her way? He was always an arse to her, ever since first-year after her Father was elected Minister, but this seemed more targeted. She didn't see him harassing other students like he did with her, not even Muggles.</p><p>With a sigh, the girl picked up her broken quill - a gift given to her by her Mother to last the year, now split in half. She couldn't write home saying how it had happened, that Lucius has been harassing her even if she did have a quill. Gwen thought herself a good liar but around her Mother it was impossible.</p><p>She'd have to pay a visit to Hogsmeade this weekend.</p><p>Throwing her broken one in the bin, Gwen checked out her book and left the library.</p><hr/><p>Gwen checked her timetable and begrudgingly made her way to the north tower for DADA. As much as she was warming up to Rookwood, she still hated the subject.</p><p>There were a couple students in class already, as well as Rookwood himself sat behind his desk reading. He was sans his robes - leaving him in a waistcoat and button-up shirt that reached his wrists. As though he wasn't expecting her, the Professor's eyebrows raised when he caught sight of Gwen shoving her knapsack on a desk at the back. When their eyes met, he sent a small nod of acknowledgement her way before turning his attention back to his book.</p><p>Gwen realised how young the Professor looked then, far younger than she thought. Without his robes he looked leaner, taller even, with curly hair that hadn't a hint of grey. It seemed like he was in his mid-twenties but it wouldn't surprise Gwen if he was younger.</p><p>She glanced at the clock above Rookwood's head and noted there were still a couple minutes left before class started. She pulled out her notebook filled with new parchment, as well as her textbook. <em>Advanced Defence Against the Dark Arts</em>, twice as big as last year and another reminder that Gwen was in over her head with this topic.</p><p>A book bag being thrown on the table drew Gwen from her thoughts.</p><p>"Mind if I sit here?" James Potter asked, already pulling out a stool.</p><p>"Um." Gwen's eyebrows drew together as she watched him take out his books. He was a little out of breath. "Sure."</p><p>She was surprised he had more textbooks than her, as well as a self-inking quill which generally didn't come cheap. The one Lucius broke was similar, though darker in colour and fitted with an eagle feather, while James' looked like a peacock's.</p><p>He settled down, an everlasting joyful smile on his face as he pushed his glasses up his nose. "Do you always sit at the back?" he asked.</p><p>"Yeah," she answered. "If there's room."</p><p>He hummed thoughtfully. "I never really noticed. But I guess we haven't shared classes in a while."</p><p>James was right - the last class they shared was Herbology in third-year when he pulled a Mandrake out of its pot and it deafened him. He was in the hospital wing for a couple of days while Pomfrey healed him.</p><p>"Don't you have other friends to sit with?" Gwen asked.</p><p>He raised his eyebrows. "Was that an insult?"</p><p>She hadn't meant for it to sound like that and startled. "What? No, I... I know you have friends, I just- I'm just-" She took a breath. "Why are you sat here?" she finished.</p><p>"Because I always sit at the back," he said, "and you seem cool." He shrugged like it was nothing. "I know we've never really spoken but Lily likes you. I mean, she usually likes everyone but, I don't know, she seems to care about you."</p><p>Gwen laughed outright at that - not in disagreement but pure astonishment. She knew that Lily defended her if she came up in conversation like she did with Alice and, if she remembered rightly, Sirius said that Lily and Remus '<em>had a word</em>' with him. Her and Lily were on good terms, most definitely, but Gwen didn't think she was so significant in her life that she talked to her friends about her, unprovoked.</p><p>"She said yes when I asked her to Hogsmeade this weekend," James continued, oblivious to Gwen's inner turmoil. "Me and Lily," he clarified. "Alice said I should take her to Madame Puddifoot's and that Lily seemed down for it."</p><p>Gwen winced. So, Sirius was right about that one. Anyone in or out Lily's circle would know she'd be lying through her teeth.</p><p>Before she could open her mouth to think about warding him off that idea, Rookwood stood. He waved his wand and slammed the classroom door shut, before introducing himself.</p><p>"If you don't know already," he spoke, his voice baritone, "I'm Professor Augustus Rookwood, your new DADA teacher and replacement for Rakepick."</p><p>She remembered Rakepick rather well, even with the few classes she attended. She was nice and laid-back, younger than Rookwood and pretty so the boys liked her. She was fired seemingly out of nowhere, and rumour circulated that she sent a killing curse towards a student and was in hiding. Because she was such a renown curse-breaker at Gringotts, the Ministry kept the situation very secret. Not even her Father said anything.</p><p>"... Now, if everybody could turn to page 84 in their textbooks, we can get started on our revision for Boggarts."</p><p>Gwen did so, as did James by her side. The page was mostly text though there was an image of a swirling black mist appearing out of a dark corner. <em>Transforms into the worst fear of the nearest observer(s)</em>, it read underneath. She remembered briefly learning about it in third-year.</p><p>"Boggarts," Rookwood began, "at their simplest, are shape-shifters who can sense your biggest fears and will exploit you by turning into it." He stepped away from his desk to observe each student. His head was tilted up, but unlike Lucius he didn't carry an arrogant air. "If you are scared of darkness, it will surround you with darkness. If you are scared of spiders, it will turn into a spider. If you are scared of a person or people, it will transform into that person or those people."</p><p>The majority of the students were taking notes while Gwen hid her paper with one hand, pretending she was writing stuff down with the other. James, she noted, was tapping his quill against his parchment absentmindedly, leaving little black dots on the page.</p><p>"There isn't a known way to defeat a Boggart but they can be sent back to where they came from and trapped with a spell." He paused, eyeing a couple of students at the front. "Can anybody tell me that spell?"</p><p>A few hands shot in the air and Rookwood nodded towards a Hufflepuff. "Miss Haywood."</p><p>"Riddikulus, sir," she answered brightly.</p><p>"Correct," he said, refocusing on the rest of the class. "At the end of today's class, a timetable will be passed around for everyone to demonstrate Riddikulus in their specified ten-minute slot. I understand not everybody wants their peers to know their biggest fears, so it will just be me to oversee that everything goes smoothly."</p><p>He talked for the majority of the class, stopping a few times to have students read segments from the textbook and answer questions - thankfully excluding Gwen. He had everyone demonstrate the spell with their wands and stated it was the easiest spell to cast, but having to force the Boggart to transform into something amusing to the individual was the most difficult part.</p><p>Gwen was zoned out for most of it, spending the fourty or so minutes staring blankly at the desk with her head in her hand, hoping Rookwood wouldn't notice her mental absence. She couldn't think of a fear that the Boggart would use. Spiders made her uncomfortable but she didn't have a problem picking them up to throw outside, and crowded spaces made her feel more nauseous than scared.</p><p>Maybe flying would be her fear.</p><p>"Gwendolyn." The girl flinched at her name being said sharply, and snapped her head to see Rookwood at her desk. "You can practice Riddikulus during your detention. Understood?"</p><p>James' attention jerked to Gwen at the word <em>detention</em> as he finished scrawling down his name on the timetable.</p><p>"Yes, sir," she muttered, ignoring the questioning look. Rookwood snatched the paper from James and his eyes filtered to Gwen's blank notes.</p><p>"Don't you have a quill, Miss Crouch?" Rookwood asked.</p><p>"It broke this morning, sir," she told him. "I didn't have time to get another one before class."</p><p>He stared at her for another second, darted his eyes to her empty page again before his lip twitched. "Be sure to have at least two quills on your person from now on. At least so you can pretend to be focused."</p><p>He left without another word. As soon as he was out of earshot, James leaned towards her.</p><p>"You got detention?" he asked, seemingly happy with the revelation. "What'd you do? Punch another student?"</p><p><em>Nearly</em>. Gwen almost nodded. "I got caught with my wand out," she said instead.</p><p>"Detention for<em> that?</em>" he said, surprised. "Good to know the new prof is strict ahead of time, I guess. Bet Lily loves him already."</p><p>"Yeah." She nodded, crossing her arms on the desk. "Hey, James?"</p><p>"Hm?"</p><p>"Do... Do you think Lily would like that?" she asked, feeling awkward. Was it even her place to give him advice, let alone <em>relationship</em> advice? "Going to Puddifoot's, I mean."</p><p>James looked at her, puzzled. "Well, it's the place for couples, right? Good chance to show my romantic side..." his eyes rounded in uncertainty, "right?"</p><p>Taking a second to think of what she wanted to say without phrasing it to sound mean, she asked, "Have you ever been?"</p><p>"Well, no," he answered truthfully, "<em>but! </em>Padfoot's had successful dates there. Doesn't seem that bad from the outside, yeah?"</p><p>"Sirius doesn't take his partners to Puddifoot's for something long-term," Gwen pointed out. Everyone knew of Sirius' escapades with girls, the majority of which ended up with them heartbroken, and everyone knew of James' dedication and loyalty to Lily. "Puddifoot's is cheesy."</p><p>"Lily doesn't like cheesy," he commented, slumping back in his chair.</p><p>"No one likes cheesy apart from second-years," Gwen agreed. "Didn't Sirius or Remus tell you this?"</p><p>"Sirius said I should go with my heart and Moony doesn't care about," he waved his hands vaguely, "all of <em>that</em>. Wormtail is... well, he's useless with girls. As you know," he added quickly. "Like, none of them have ever been in a serious relationship. The most attached Padfoot got to a girl was Marlene in third-year." He tapped his chin in thought, darting his gaze to her. "Have you? Ever been in a relationship, I mean."</p><p>"Nothing serious." Gwen shrugged, averting her eyes to her blank notebook. "You don't have to listen to me or anything, I just-"</p><p>"No, no, no!" he interjected loudly, earning a sharp look from Rookwood who was speaking with another student. James waved apologetically and ducked his head towards Gwen like they were conspiring. </p><p>"No, I appreciate it. Really," he said. "It's hard to get a girls opinion on this, you know? I guess Alice was, like... maybe she was testing me?" Gwen didn't doubt that for a second. The girl was known for being brash and protective over her friends, so it wasn't out of character. "Where else could I take her?" he pondered. "There's not much in Hogsmeade that's date-worthy. The Three Broomsticks gets a bit repetitive after a while."</p><p>That much was true. "Then let her decide," the girl advised. James looked unsure, so she carried on. "You know Lily more than me so you don't have to, but I feel like it's something she'd appreciate. She might want to go shopping, to the bookshop or just find a bench to sit on and talk. Either way, you'll both enjoy it."</p><p>He considered that, humming under his breath. "I guess," he said, then relaxed his posture with a grin. "Thanks for that, Gwen."</p><p>She sent a small smile back. "No problem.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p> I know this is a boring chapter for waiting such a long time and I'm so sorry. I lost someone very recently so it's been difficult to motivate myself to write, but I think I'm back on track now. I know I shouldn't say I hate this chapter, but god I hate this chapter. There'll be a lot more Sirius next chapter, I promise!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gwen found herself finishing up her notes for Care of Magical Creatures after dinner, sat in the common room just as the sun was beginning to set. The weather was turning cold and the clouds were growing heavy, leaving her wrapped in more layers than the preceding weeks. She had on a striped jumper, golden and red like her house, with a pair of joggers and fluffy socks.</p><p>Sat crossed-legged at one of the tables, she had her quill borrowed from the library in hand with her textbook open in front of her. Writing notes came easy to her but having to dip the quill in the ink every line or so became tiring. She was glad it was almost the weekend so she could buy a new one.</p><p>Lily and Marlene sat on the small table next to her; Lily attempting to tutor Marlene while Marlene struggled, though the redhead stopped to make jokes every now and then to ease Marlene's stress. It seemed to work.</p><p>Alice was on the large sofa with Frank, almost lying down with their hands entwined. They were speaking quietly but Gwen could see the softness in their eyes, the comfort in their posture. It was really sweet. She'd even say overly-cute if it wasn't for how they kept their relationship between them. They didn't do the whole PDA thing.</p><p>A lot of people had crushes on Alice. She was beautiful and could hold a conversation with anyone, which would often be mistaken as flirting. When it got out that she was dating the non-conventionally attractive Frank Longbottom, with his too-big ears and awkward persona, the bullying towards him got worse. Though Gwen wasn't there, she heard that Alice stood up on the table in the Great Hall and announced that she was, in fact, Frank's girlfriend, and she would hex anyone who gave him shit. After that, the majority of the students left him alone.</p><p>It was sweet, seeing someone so protective over him.</p><p>Though, that entire friend group was similar in that way. Protective over each other, and pretty. Gorgeous, Gwen would venture to say, without being arrogant like a lot of girls in their year. Lily with her fiery hair and smooth complexion, Alice with her pixie haircut and edgy personality, and Marlene with hair so blonde it was almost white and her tall stature, as well as muscle from being Gryffindor's Chaser for a year. She was beautiful- <em>all</em> of them were beautiful.</p><p>Gwen envied them in that regard. They were so confident and effortless.</p><p>The common room's doors opening drew her attention, and in stepped Sirius and James with Peter trailing behind them, all grins and happy-go-lucky attitudes. They - at least James and Sirius - were wearing their quidditch uniforms, though Sirius was noticeably missing his robes, leaving him in a fitted long-sleeved shirt. His hair was mussed and Gwen noted he was still wearing his leather gloves as he ran his hands through the sweat-damp strands.</p><p>It was... weirdly attractive.</p><p>The thought punched her in the chest out of nowhere.</p><p>She had eyes, obviously, and knew that the group were nice to look at. Even Peter had his charm, but she'd never think to call any of them attractive. James was a charmer and Remus had the book-ish look about him, though looking at Sirius now, a little out of breath with his chest rising and falling, hand falling to rest on his stomach...</p><p>Still grinning, his eyes turned from James to her.</p><p><em>Godric</em>.</p><p>Gwen was quick to dart her gaze back to her textbook, using her hand to hide her wince.</p><p>
  <em>Let the guy know you're checking him out, why don't you?</em>
</p><p>Squeezing her eyes shut for a moment, she sighed and pushed away those embarrassing thoughts, letting her focus shift back into her studying.</p><p>Until a hand was placed on the chair opposite her, of course.</p><p>"Hey," Sirius greeted chipperly. "Can I...?" He gestured.</p><p>"Um, sure," she said with a nod, pressing her lips into a smile. She glanced behind him and saw James looking at them, a little confused but he waved at Gwen regardless. On the other side of him, Lily was still trying to tutor Marlene but the redhead’s eyes kept drifting to James.</p><p>"I didn't realise you did Care." Sirius brought her attention back to him as he tapped his finger against the open page of her textbook. "Suits you, though. Have you met Buckbeak yet? New baby hippogriff."</p><p>"I haven't." Gwen shook her head and frowned. "Are you okay?”</p><p>It was Sirius' turn to look confused. "Yeah, I'm good. Why wouldn't I be?"</p><p>"I'm asking why you're here."</p><p>"Oh, right." He perked up, leaning forward to brace his arms on the table. "So, you know how in quidditch - quidditch at school, I mean - you need certain grades to get in?" Gwen didn't know, but nodded for him to continue. "So, I need all A's with at least one E, and I can probably get away with one P because, well, it's me, but if I get two P's, then I'll get reviewed and maybe kicked off the team."</p><p>Gwen nodded, this time slower. "Is there a point to this?" she asked.</p><p>He smiles, one corner of his lip quirked. "Have you ever tutored anyone before?"</p><p>"Okay." She shook her head, almost laughing as she began to close her textbook. "I'm not-"</p><p>"Wait!" His hand was on the book in an instant, slamming it back on the table. "Please."</p><p>For a long moment, they stared at each other, hands on opposite sides of the textbook with the tips of their fingers almost touching. It felt oddly weighted, the clear desperation on Sirius' face and Gwen's expression of agitation, clashing to form a lilt of tension.</p><p>"Please," Sirius broke the moment. He wet his dry lips. "Just give me a minute to explain and you can still say no. I won't give you shit for it, promise."</p><p>Gwen looked like she wasn't going to give in for a moment. Sirius watched as her fingers flexed against the textbook, how she inhaled like she was about to stand.</p><p>Eventually, she settled, placing her hand back on the table.</p><p>"Go on."</p><p>Those were the words that made Sirius grin widely. He wasted no time.</p><p>"When Flitwick pulled me aside after class, he recommended you as a tutor," he explained. "It'd benefit us both - he'll give you extracurricular points that'll look good on your file, and I'll get to keep playing quidditch. Flitwick says you're his best student, so it shouldn't take too long to get me to the top, yeah?"</p><p>"It'll be for most of the year if you want to keep your grades up," Gwen pointed out, to which Sirius shrugged.</p><p>"Only twice a week for an hour. You skive off a lot so I'm sure we could do it then, at least when I have frees." He added, "Flitwick said every Monday and Thursday in his classroom or in the library. He trusts that you'll keep note of our sessions."</p><p>Sirius could see the internal debate occurring behind her dark eyes, the way she chewed the corner of her lip as she met his gaze head-on. </p><p>With an eventual sigh, she relented. "Fine."</p><p>He almost punched his fist in the air and yelled in triumph. <em>Almost</em>. He managed to push down that temptation.</p><p>"<em>But</em>," Gwen continued, "we do this by my rules. I don't skive off just to skive off, and we might have to rearrange sometimes but I'll still do twice a week. I'm gonna take this as seriously as you do, so if you fuck around then I'm out."</p><p>Sirius nodded eagerly. "We're starting next Monday, then?" he asked.</p><p>"I have detention," she explained. "I can do Tuesday, though."</p><p>"Detention?" he echoed, raising his eyebrows. "I'm impressed, Crouch. Beat someone up?"</p><p>She shook her head, though there was a hint of a smile on her lips like she knew something he didn't. "Caught with my wand out. Rookwood, the new DADA prof."</p><p>"Damn." He slumped back in the seat, crossing his arms over his chest. Gwen's eyes followed the motion, lingering for a moment on his arms, but she quickly looked away. <em>Huh</em>. "Gwendolyn the badass."</p><p>She snapped her eyes to him.</p><p>"Sorry, sorry." He raised his hands in defence. "<em>Gwen</em> the badass," he corrected.</p><p>"You know you get more detentions than me, right?" she said.</p><p>"Yeah, well," he smirked, giving her a faux-suave look, "I'm <em>Sirius-ly</em> a badass, too."</p><p>The corners of Gwen's lips curled involuntarily, and she laughed.</p><p>Actually <em>laughed</em>.</p><p>It was a heartbreakingly short laugh, but filled with such a warmth that contradicted her entire personality. Though it wasn't even the laugh that made him pause - it was her <em>smile</em>. He couldn't recall a time he'd seen her expression so... <em>sweet,</em> so... so <em>nice</em>. The light crinkling of her eyes and the way she gently covered her mouth as if to muffle it...</p><p>It morphed Sirius' grin into something more gentle.</p><p>"That was awful," Gwen said, but didn't try to hide the lingering amusement. "Just so you know."</p><p>"Oh, I know," Sirius confirmed. "Made you laugh though, didn't it?"</p><p>"Yeah, yeah..." She rolled her eyes. "Hope you don't use that line on all the girls, Black."</p><p>"If you want me to woo you, all you have to do is ask," he jested. </p><p>She laughed again, quieter this time as she looked away, keeping her expression soft. It almost felt like she was doing it on purpose, like some kind of reward for amusing her.</p><p>They went into a silence then, bordering between awkward and comfortable. Her eyes were fixated on her notes and his were fixated on her.</p><p>She...</p><p>She was <em>nice</em>.</p><p>Like Sirius she had armour, but while Sirius used his flirty personality to hide his skin Gwen did the opposite. She used her prickliness to keep people at bay, and it seemed like Lily was the only one that managed to crack a chip in the armour.</p><p>
  <em>And he was an asshole to her for it.</em>
</p><p>"I'm sorry," he blurted.</p><p>Gwen looked up. "What?"</p><p>"For being a dick to you."</p><p>A frown. "You already apologised, it's-"</p><p>"No." He shook his head. "No, that wasn't an apology. That was... I don't know what it was, but it was shit." She was silent so he went on. "I shouldn't have been an arse to you, I shouldn't have assumed you're like your dad, and I shouldn't judge you when the things you've done... well, when I would've done the same, if not tamer." As many hexes as he'd cast on students, he's never actually punched anyone before. "I can tell you're a good person. Moony and Lily wouldn't have vouched for you if you weren't. Hell, even Prongs seems to like you now."</p><p>Her eyes rounded and her lips parted like she didn't know what to say. "Listen, I- um, it," she laughed breathily to herself, "it's really okay. Like I said before, you're forgiven. We're all good now."</p><p>Apparently that was what Sirius needed to hear.</p><p>"It's not the worse I've been through," she continued. He didn't doubt that for a second. "My brother's a bloody Death Eater, after all. He-" she cut herself off. "It doesn't matter. You get what it's like."</p><p>Sirius' heart clenched at the thought of his own brother. Regulus would be sixteen now. He knew the age to receive the Dark Mark was sixteen, so there was little doubt he had one by now. Just like Barty Crouch.</p><p>"I think your friends want you now," Gwen said, nodding behind Sirius. "James looks like he's gonna cry if he goes any longer without you."</p><p>Sirius laughed at that. "Yeah. Sounds about right. So, I'll see you on Tuesday, then?"</p><p>Gwen nodded with a short smile. "It's a plan."</p><p>"Great." He tapped his knuckles on the desk, biting his lip as he grinned widely. "Catch you later, Crouch."</p><hr/><p>Potions went by quickly for Gwen the next day. The class finished their Draught of Peace potions and the only groups to brew it successfully were Lily and Gwen, and Remus and James, though Gwen was aware it was only because of her and James' partners.</p><p>As a reward, Slughorn let them keep the brews after pouring them carefully into vials. Gwen and Lily stubbornly argued on who should have it and, after a lot of persisting on Gwen's side, Lily eventually relented and kept the potion for herself. Even if she wasn't happy about it.</p><p>Transfiguration with James and Charms which she had with Remus went by just as fast. She didn't get the chance to talk to Remus as she arrived late and the seats around him were taken, but he did smile at her and she returned it.</p><p>When she got back to her dorm, she found Pancake waiting on her window with a letter from her Mother.</p><p>
  <em>Gwen,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Here are some extra coins for your first trip to Hogsmeade. Treat yourself, my dear. You deserve it.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Write back when you can. Father sends his regards.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Mother.</em>
</p><p>Although it was unneeded, she appreciated the pouch of money. Father had given her a hefty amount to last the term, far more than she needed, but she could use the spare for Christmas gifts.</p><p>The first Hogsmeade of the year came the next day after a boring morning spent inside, with everyone in her dorm getting ready and dressing up, particularly Lily who had her date with James. Even from behind her curtain she could hear the panic in the red-head's voice. She'd never seen her nervous before, let alone because of James Potter.</p><p>Gwen pulled her woolly hat over her hair and pulled on some gloves, deciding last minute to keep the scarf. She was wearing a turtleneck and though snow hadn’t begun to fall yet, she was susceptible to the cold.</p><p>There was a light pattering of rain as she walked through the streets, her hood over her head and hands deep in her pockets. The streets were crowded, the majority of students outside but the area around Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop was scarce.</p><p>"Ah, it's good to see you again, Miss Crouch!" Scrivenshaft greeted upon seeing the girl, clapping his hands together. "Do you need help finding anything, dear?"</p><p>"I'm okay, thank you, Scrivenshaft," Gwen said. She unwrapped her scarf so it was hanging across her shoulders, the heat inside a sharp contrast to the freezing rain.</p><p>She chewed the inside of her cheek as she browsed the quill aisle, walking slowly so she could skim over each label. It got more expensive as she walked on, with the more ingenious and difficult adjustments and soft feathers which felt nicer to the touch.</p><p>"Gwen?"</p><p>The girl turned and saw Charlie Wood stood at the end of the aisle, propped against a shelf with something in his hand. He was silhouetted by the outside light.</p><p>"Oh," Gwen said, surprised. "Um, hey, Charlie." She smiled an awkward tight-lipped smile, darting her eyes away quickly.</p><p>"Already lost your quill, huh?" he asked, walking closer to her. She swallowed as he stopped beside her, observing the boxes of quills with squinted eyes. "I'm a fan of the sugar quills from Zonko's, myself."</p><p>Gwen frowned. "Sugar quills?" she repeated.</p><p>"Yep. They put them out last year." Charlie turned to her, the grin faint on his lips but still present. "Instead of feathers, they put sweets on the end of quills to look like the real thing." He shrugged. "Pretty handy if you're sat at the back and feeling peckish."</p><p>"Then why are you browsing quills here?" she asked, holding her hand over the strap of her knapsack, looking up at him.</p><p>He leaned closer, whispering in a mock-flirtatious tone, "The company, of course, darling." His lips widened with the chuckle that escaped, and Gwen couldn't help but smile back with the shake of her head. He really hasn't changed much<em>.</em> "As much as I'd like to catch up with you, I'm here on business." He held up a leather-bound book. "Gotta write notes, even in sixth-year."</p><p>"Catch up?" she blurted. He was nice- he'd always been nice, but catching up with the girl you dated for a couple weeks, years ago? </p><p>Still, Charlie shrugged his shoulder like it was ordinary for him. "Of course," he said. "I promise I'm not asking you on a date, but it would be nice to talk to you again. I meant what I said when I ended things, Gwen."</p><p>
  <em>You're the right person, but it's bad timing for the both of us.</em>
</p><p>"I, I don't think your teammates would like that very much," she said instead.</p><p>Charlie raised a blonde eyebrow. "You think I made Captain of the Quidditch team by doing what everyone likes?" he pointed out, swaying to nudge her shoulder. "<em>C'mon</em>. Don't you want to be seen in public with the prettiest Quidditch player in all of Hogwarts?"</p><p>"I think that title technically goes to Marlene," she pointed out.</p><p>"Well, I can't argue with that." He nodded in agreement, to which Gwen blushed slightly. "Hey, if you wanna say no to catching up I won't take offence." He crossed his arms, tucking the book in the crook of his elbow.</p><p>"No wounded ego?" she asked quietly.</p><p>"Nah," he assured. "Deflated, maybe, but not wounded. Takes a lot to pierce this heart of gold."</p><p>Gwen pressed her lips together to stop her laugh escaping.</p><p>She wanted to tell him there was nothing to catch up on, besides her brother's betrayal. Besides the fact her Father drank more and talked less, how her Mother was becoming more and more fragile all because of Barty, like Gwen wasn't enough for them.</p><p>She would've told him. Godric, she <em>did</em>. Gwen told Charlie so much about her life when they were together, when she was a young girl who didn't get any attention from anyone outside her family, until he gave her that Golden Snitch and smiled at her like he enjoyed being with her.</p><p>"Find me if you ever wanna hang," Charlie continued, seemingly noting her apprehension. "I'll be with Sean and Angelica a lot this week. If not, I'll be at the Quidditch pitch."</p><p>Gwen knew she would've stuttered if she spoke right away, so she took an extra moment to read the quill description in front of her. <em>Charms include self-inking and quick-note-taking, topped off with an eagle feather.</em> Three galleons altogether, a little expensive but still cheaper than her previous quill.</p><p>She bit the inside of her lip and tapped her foot, looking back up at Charlie.</p><p>"Sure," she concluded. "I'll think about it."</p><p>Charlie, with his smile framing the dimple on his left cheek, nodded. "Great," he said. "That's... yeah. I'll see you around, then?"</p><p>They bid their goodbyes, and Charlie moved to the counter to pay for his leather book. He waved at her on his way out, which she returned as she continued browsing.</p><p>She ended up buying the eagle-feathered quill and placed the thin box in her bag before making her way back to Hogwarts.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm gonna stop apologising for updating super late because this is unfortunately how it's gonna be now lol sorry. Thanks for the support on the last chapter and being so understanding of my situation, though:) </p><p>And yes Gwen is bi, I cannot for the life of me write a heterosexual OC. I'm not gonna make it a focus for this fic but she definitely looks at women as much as she looks at men!</p>
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